Mary sat and listened, Martha did. I learned to dislike my name intensely because I heard so many preachers berate Martha from the pulpit. Then as I got older I started berating myself not for the name but those terrible Martha characteristics I saw in myself. Why couldn’t I be more Mary? FBC was about to launched the 40 DAYS of Purpose and I was the campaign director, trying to organize 500 people into small groups when we had never done small groups before. During those same months I was involved in a huge work project where another 400 people were depending on me to lead them into the world of using the computer instead of paper in the hospital setting. I worked harder, I worked longer, each night I fell into bed exhausted usually to wake early with thoughts of what I needed to do racing through my mind. One morning at about 3 AM, I awoke AGAIN! I rolled over and tried to ignore the thoughts, roll left (a little voice said get up), roll right (not yet), roll left (come on I want to talk to you). Well sleep was gone! I pulled my weary self out of bed. Through the brain fog I could hear the gentle urging of my Father saying ‘come talk to me’ – So as I shuffled to the coffee maker I told Him, “I could really use a specific word from YOU today, something that really speaks to my heart.” I opened my Bible to the devotion for the day and read, “Martha, Martha you are worried and troubled about many things.” Ok Lord – I get it! The same words that had sounded like condemnation all those years became words of comfort and understanding. He knows me, He understands me. And then in John 11:5 it says, “Jesus loved Martha.” Now I love my name! Jesus loves me this I know! For the Bible tells me so.